How to manage anger towards children: 4 tips
Even the best parents lose their temper, argue and get angry with their children. But is there a way not to explode and scream, to keep calm and raise children gently and responsibly?
Can be done; the first step is awareness of emotions (including anger). Here are 4 tips on how to manage children's anger.
1. Think before you act
Everyone knows that anger leads to saying things you don't want to say and doing things you don't want to do.
So, no instinctive reactions: it is important, when we feel anger rising, to take a few minutes to calm down.
For example, it is possible to explain to the child what you are feeling and tell him that you are leaving for a moment as you are getting hot. The child will understand that anger is an emotion, that anger is okay and that it can be talked about, but it is better to do it later, in the right way and in the right context.
2. No system of threats and punishments
Parents should be aware that acting by threatening and punishing their children is wrong and often harmful, as you risk an escalation of the conflict and you will lose the opportunity to resolve it maturely, as an adult.
3. Do not generalize or absolutize
Another important aspect is the avoidance of generalizations: one should not absolutize a negative aspect of the child's character.
If anything, parents should talk about what specifically made them angry; don't make clear judgments about what your child is or should be.
4. Do not bring out personal tensions in children
Parents are sometimes stressed by personal or work problems, and in the most difficult moments they can take out their anger on their children.