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The boy I knew did not come to the meeting because he found out that I had been vaccinated

The boy I knew did not come to the meeting because he found out that I had been

'Do you remember me?'. This was the message that came to me in a dating app. I went in to look at the photos and no, I did not remember. My heart was racing when I took the picture. A blond gentleman, handsome, tall, in shape… How could I have forgotten such a man ?!

He then wrote to me how he was a high school friend. He was right. It was Gabe. The basketball star at school, always surrounded by beautiful girls. He and I had no memories together from high school because I spent my lunch break at the library, with a book in front of me.

It had been 20 years since then. Now we were both almost 40 years old. We exchanged phone numbers.

When we first spoke to Facetime, he was sitting in a car. Her skin glowed. It was safe, fun, smiling, radiant…

Most of our peers live on the outskirts of Minneapolis, where we did high school. They are married, have children, stable jobs, stable lives. Pose in front of pumpkins and look happy. They are not people who move to California to pursue impossible dreams. But I did. And Gabe did too. I feel completely connected to this person I know mostly through a lens of nostalgia.

I invited him to a dinner that would take place after a month.

We both knew dinner was just the word…

For 30 days I imagined what sex would be like with him. Although we have never been friends, there is a comfort in people from the past. I imagined what aroma he could carry and I could hardly wait for the day.

"When are you coming for dinner?" I wrote. Did not respond for 24 hours. After 24 hours he replied: "I have wanted you since high school". I fell on the phone.

Yes the enthusiasm lasted a bit. The next message continued: "But we can not have sex together, because we exchange body fluids and you got the vaccine, I do not believe in it."

I hoped I had read it wrong. I hoped it was a spelling mistake.

He repeated to me.

"If we have sex, we exchange secretions and I do not trust the vaccine."

Vibe died! I remembered Tom, a screenwriter I met at Marina in 2020. The sex with him was very good, great, really ... and then he told me he would vote for Kanye. After that, the sex was not the same.

We are in two different worlds: mine; a worldview immersed in data and science. He seems to be immersed in a world where ‘doing research’ is similar to immersing oneself in a rabbit hole of conspiracy theories.

I still fantasize about a world where nostalgic lust transcends rational thought…