"I am very hurt, I want to leave, I can not continue with him!" Greek media publish Carolina Crouch diary
Greek media "To Thema" has managed to access the personal diary of 20-year-old British Caroline Crouch who was killed by her Greek husband, Haralambos Anagnostopoulos in the eyes of their 11-month-old child.
Caroline's notes speak of a problematic relationship, but also of the love she had for her husband who would become her killer, with whom she was related at the age of 17, when he was 30.
"I hit him and shoved him, then he broke down the door. "I'm not well, I'm very bad, but at least I know he would never hurt my baby," Carolina wrote in a note a few months ago.
On November 15, 2019, she describes the beginning of her desire to become a mother and describes her experiences: “I am 18 years old and I want to try to have children. I have not told Haralambos yet, because today we got caught and to hurt him I told him that I am glad we lost our baby so that I would not have to look after his family. I was hurt from the moment I said it and I regretted it. When I get out of myself I don’t care how much I hurt her. I want to hurt her as much as I can. I believe this is because I myself am very hurt and many times bring out anger and despair to him. "He does not deserve to be treated that way, but sometimes he does not realize that the only thing I need is to be with him."
In another note, Caroline writes: “Yesterday I had an affair with Babis. I called and hit her and told her I did not love our baby. We did not talk about this at all yesterday and today we woke up well, ate, had a good time, but in the afternoon he asked me about yesterday. I'm not well, I'm very upset and I believe he would not hurt our child. My love for him is greater than for anyone else in the world. I'm just overwhelmed by my hormones and Babis needs to know this. I'm ashamed to tell him. I know he would support me, but I can not tell. I'm not well, but I'm trying for my baby. I do not want to feel that my mother does not love her. "My hormonal problems are mine."
On December 20, 2019, she describes another clash with her husband: “Today we got caught. Shortly after we ate breakfast I hit him, shaved him and ran to the office. All day he asked me what I wanted to eat. I ate nothing. I am lying in bed and can not eat because I am extremely tense. I went out on the balcony only in my shirt and I was crying ... I'm not well ".
The next day she writes: “We got busy again. This time very bad. I hit him and shoved him. He broke down the door. The only thing I wanted was for him to ask me if I was okay when I woke up. I woke up powerless and tired. I'm thinking of leaving. To go to my sister. I do not want to continue with Babis. "But I love him so much that I can not leave him, even though this relationship hurts me."
On July 3, 2020, when the girl was 1 month old, Carolina wrote: “Today the little one turned one month old and today is the day I told Babis that I want to leave home ... I felt and feel terribly bad. He just left to make an appointment for the girl and I started looking for a home. I found what I needed in Halandri. When he returned from the hospital he asked me if I wanted to separate. I did not answer ... after many cries and calls from him I told him that I was thinking about it before I got pregnant to leave her, but then I stayed with him so that the girl would not grow up without her two parents. "